What Anxiety (can) Feel Like

I suffer from anxiety…  And I’m trying to figure out my triggers…  For me one is my high personal expectations…  The rest are still a mystery… 

I can be sitting watching TV when I suddenly start feeling overwhelmed…  For me it’s in my head and chest…  Then it takes off…  At times it feels like my chest and gut are in a vice grip….  Incredible pressure… Literally equal to the hardest contractions during child birth… 

At times there are thoughts other times not. 

Sometimes I can feel every heart beat throughout my entire body…  My chest, gut, throat,  fingers,  arms,  legs,  head and even ears…  My heart isn’t racing…  I just feel it… 

When it’s finally over I’m exhausted both physically and mentally…  And I’m usually nauseous or have indigestion… 

It’s a party my body has that wasn’t wanted… 

When it’s that high I need to take either Ativan or another PRN to calm my system down as I feel like I’m going through a meat grinder…  

Ginger ale is my favourite drink now (diet of course)… 

Sometimes I just go to a quiet place and try to sleep…  Sometimes I INTENTLY listen to music…  Classical…  I try to figure out what each individual instrument is playing…  I personally love the Album Symphony of Praise which combines favourite classical songs with favourite Church songs…  My soul is soothed and my brain is occupied…  A double win… 

Other times I can walk while listening to upbeat praise songs…   Treadmill is handy as I can close my eyes while focusing on the music without fear of walking into something… 

I pray,  I distract and I wait for normalicy to return… 

3 Comments

  1. margaret

    Way to go for being so honest. It’s refreshing.

    • sryall

      My goal is to ease the stigma surrounding mental illness…

      • margaret

        One of my sons suffers from depression, anxiety among other things. It’s really tough for him. He’s also autistic (but very aware)

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